Since Capitalism is evil I’m sure the studio will shun all fast food and merchandising tie-ins…
I have not seen the movie, “Red Dawn,” but I’ve heard you all talking about it many times in Threedonia. I went to James (don’t call him Jim!) Lileks’ place today, following the link Chuck had posted, and here’s what I found:
Over the fire I chatted with a neighbor who’s working on the “Red Dawn” remake. Get this: in the new version, China and Russia invade the US – to put a stop to our greed. There are times you wish you had a mouthful of kerosene so you could do a flaming spit take. If this is how the film turns out, it’ll be hilarious; it’s as if the filmmakers were a bit ambivalent about all the horrible jingoism that such a film might unleash, so they had to temper it with a bit of theoretical altruism that could be true, you know, in a sense. I almost expect the Russians and Chinese to invade to enforce Copenhagen protocols, and the brave Americans fight back for a modified rollout of carbon emission standards that will allow domestic industry to perfect the new HydroWind Energy System, which the Chinese don’t want because they just signed a UN agreement to respect patents of other countries.
Well, it can’t be worse than Transformers, unless it includes transforming Russian soldiers that turn into liquor bottles. I did watch Transformers 2: the Fall of the Revenging or something; I expected kinetic nonsense, and got it, but I really missed the heartfelt contemplative tone of the first one. Really. Sort of. Compared to the sequel, the first one was a Merchant-Ivory version of a Turgenev short story. I know, I know, it’s a stupid movie about robots, and you’re just supposed to sit back and let it pummel you bloody, but I still have trouble with the concept: these robot-creatures have rockets for feet and can travel great distances by walking or running or flying. So naturally, when they want to go somewhere, they turn into cars. Interesting to see the great ruins of Egypt destroyed; interesting also to note that no modern scientist ever noticed the presence of a giant dense machine in the center of the pyramids. Amosbot and Andybot were as appalling as advertised; John Turtorro acted like a man who got repetitive stress injuries from flushing his thespian credentials down the toilet, but hey: it’s a living, and can’t begrudge him that.
In the spirit of full disclosure I have not seen either “Transformers” movie and cannot imagine either is the least bit interesting. I know I’m probably wrong, but just as James (don’t call him Jim!) points out the inanity of how the robot-things move, I can’t get beyond the inanity of the whole concept. I don’t understand watching a 2 hour movie based on a children’s toy. I seem to be just old enough to not have a certain aspect of childhood imbued in my spirit. I like to have fun. I like toys. I enjoy playing games. Yet, there are other adults I know who take toys and playing to a different level. As much as I really liked playing with my Mattell Whirlybird helicopter as a young boy, and I really, really did, I can’t imagine ponying up $7.50 to see a 90 minute movie based on a real life version of a whirlybird. Maybe I’d see a Matt Mason movie, because movies about Astronauts can be cool, but whether the lead astronaut was named Matt Mason or Buzz Aldrin would not influence my decision. Just because I played with a doll (excuse me, action figure) named Matt Mason doesn’t mean I’ll pony up $7.50 for nostalgia with popcorn.
Oh well, what do I know. You kids can go to any movie you like, just stay off my lawn!
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Once the Caliphate is established, they’ll re-make “300,” with Xerxes as the good guy.
He did win, after all!
How…wait I have to gather myself…how have you not seen Red Dawn???
As for the remake of Red Dawn I will not yet push the panic button on that storyline because I remember similar story lines floating around before the GI Joe movie stating they’d be a branch of the UN. We shall see. At some point I’m hoping Hollywood realizes movies with Conservative themes are huge hits (300, Dark Knight) whereas movies with Liberal themes (Rendition and the other 3.6 million anti-war/ anti-America films) flop.
By the way watch the first Transformers. Ignore the second.
Veruckt,
Yes, rumors may abound, but James (don’t call him Jim!) Lileks is not a knee-jerk sort of fellow. He’s a reporter’s reporter and if he states it with authority you can assume he’s got an iron-clad source. He also claims his source is one of the writers. It could be the script will be revised, but I’d feel comfortable going to the bank with the theory that this is, in fact, the current plot.
“…in the new version, China and Russia invade the US – to put a stop to our greed”
I can’t even begin to-
This is the stupidest-
How can anybody with a functioning brain stem-
WHAT????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?
SWEAR TO GOD – THIS IS EXACTLY THE SORT HOLLYWOOD LIBTARD HORSESHIT THAT MAKES GROWN MEN WANT TO FLING THEIR OWN DUNG – WHICH I MIGHT FLY TO HOLLYWOOD AND DO – AND WHICH WOULD PROBABLY EARN ME A JOB AS A SCRIPTWRITER!!!!!!!
SHEESH!
Rufus I’m hoping he is wrong. I expect them to try and make us the bad guy somehow but this seems outlandish by even liberal moonbat standards.
Also we may need to sedate Trzupr.
Dung flinging first – then sedation.
Somebody tell Porvaznik to duck.
“I eat pieces of crap like you for breakfast!”
“You eat pieces of crap for breakfast?”
I know some inside stuff and what Lileks says is bullshit. Sorry but he dove into the 2 percent and ignored 98 percent. I can’t say what I know byeond that I do know that Milius himself is part of the production and the people doing the film are pretty hard core conservatives. So….there ya go.
Stephanie,
I trust your source, based on your credibility. It’s odd Lileks would write that. I don’t think it was sarcasm that I misinterpreted. Could be his party guest was lying about his involvement, but it’s also surprising Lileks would report something from a source he did not know as reliable. Very interesting…
First, seconding Veruckt’s WTF!?!? Rent the damn movie, Rufus. Nay, be the good conservative and buy it. Because I’m a whore: several reasons why you won’t regret the purchase.
More importantly, if the storyline’s true, we need to petition newly inducted Friend of Threedonia Rep. McCotter. Surely, with the production in/near his district, he can shut down a POS like that.
Meh…I’m not going to see it. I saw the original and that’s it for me. It was good for what it was in it’s era. Why doesn’t the Brain Trust in Hollywood remake a bad movie?
Eric breath. Lileks got very wrong information. Trust me on that. Please just trust me. I can’t believe he’d say anything in such a knee jerk way…wait a minute I do the same thing. I am going to send this link to someone so he can see it. Gonna dig more.
In retrospect I don’t think Lileks did a very good job explaining what he was told I’d bet. I could hear a commie saying something like that but if they do what I am sure they are doing we could see more than just reds from outside teh country getting slapped around, we will also see their American helper dudes getting it.
I know some inside stuff and what Lileks says is bullshit.
I hope you’re right. It’s interesting that they’re opening it right AFTER the 2010 midterm elections instead of before. If the Republicans were in power we all know that by hook or crook a political film which would appeal to Democrats would be opened before the election.
I agree with Stephanie:
I find this extremely hard to believe. No matter how America-hating Obama-backslapping the Hollywood studio system may be, there’s no way in hell they’re gonna’ make a huge-budget summer popcorn flick in which we’re the bad guy, and the invaders are right. Never, never, never, not in a million years. Even the studios know this would alienate 4/5ths of the country. Hell, it would probably alienate 4/5ths of California itself!
Now, if the bad guys invade, and their *JUSTIFICATION* is to put a stop to our greed, but in actual fact it’s just empty propaganda to cover their own greed, and take what we’ve got – yeah, that’s plausible in a movie script, but really, turning Red Dawn in to an anti-American hate-fest simply could not happen.
Lileks simply reported something his neighbor, someone associated with the film, said to him. Lileks even hedged the report, and from his words doesn’t seem to invest a great deal of belief in that angle. You might all take a moment and take a deep breath.
NO WE WILL NOT TAKE A DEEP BREATH! WE WANT MASS HYSTERIA! BLOODY MURDER! BLOODY MURDER!
[...] right, same somebody who, regardless of their admirable enthusiasm, we’ve learned has a helluva time making accurate predictions during the first weeks in November the last couple years. I know some inside stuff and what Lileks [...]