The Uighar’s Link — Palau!

In an unexpected development, it appears that President Obama’s bailout plan included an earmark for a joint venture between the CBS and NBC television networks.

The Uighar’s Link — Palau! will be co-hosted by Jeff Probst and Ann Robinson, in a combination of their two programs, The Weakest Link and Survivor.

Jeff Probst and Anne Robinson will co-host the new series.

The premise of the series is simple.  The Uighars (pronounced “WEE-gurs”) that are currently being held at Guantanamo Bay in Cuba will be released into another tropical paradise—Palau.

One of Palau's many beaches.

Once there, they will be put to the test by both Probst and Robinson.

“We haven’t finalized anything yet.  We’re still in the brainstorming stage,” stated Jeff Probst.  “We’re thinking about having a ‘saw off the infidel’s head’ race, a ‘find Mecca’s direction first’ contest, or—and this is really wild—a ‘stone that homosexual’ free-for-all!  Whatever we end up with, I know the audience won’t want to miss it.”

Uighar terrorists: 'Death to America!'

Alternating with Probst’s challenges will be trivia questions posed by Anne Robinson.

“Oh, I don’t know,” Robinson replied when asked what sort of questions to expect.  ”Things like, ‘How many virgins does a martyr receive?’  I suppose.  Maybe mix things up a bit.  ‘Name a book besides the Koran,’ maybe?  That should stump them!”

Will Anne keep using her trademark, “You are the weakest link!” line?

“I should think not,” Robinson answered.  “We’re working on that, focus-groups and such.  So far, we’re leaning towards, ‘With all due respect, my lord, I fear you must depart.’  The only trouble is that it’s hard to understand all that, because the burka muffles my voice.”

The Uighar who wins the program will be rewarded by being allowed to become a martyr for Islam.  The losers will be forced to blow themselves up in crowded marketplaces.

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